DO YOU SEE AN ELEPHANT?
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Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Ephesians 6:13
YELLOW
by Coldplay
Look at the stars
Look how they shine for you
And everything you do
Yeah, they were all yellow
I came along
I wrote a song for you
And all the things you do
And it was called 'Yellow'
So then I took my time
Oh what a thing to've done
And it was all yellow
Your skin, oh yeah, your skin and bones
Turn into something beautiful
D'you know? You know I love you so
You know I love you so
I swam across
I jumped across for you
Oh what a thing to do
'Cause you were all yellow
I drew a line
I drew a line for you
Oh what a thing to do
And it was all yellow
Your skin, oh yeah, your skin and bones
Turn into something beautiful
D'you know? For you I bleed myself dry
For you I bleed myself dry
It's true
Look how they shine for you
Look how they shine for you
Look how they shine for
Look how they shine for you
Look how they shine for you
Look how they shine
Look at the stars
Look how they shine for you
And all the things that you do
Y O U T U B E L O V E
MusicandMuffins <3
:D
P R O F I L E
me myself and i :D
Hello (: my name is Caleb chan. An ordinary muggle who wishes he got that letter when he was 11. So jelly of all those wizkids who are now learning how to shoot fire out of their magik wands and make things fly. I like my MACAROONSand chocolate and green tea and ice cream and and and I'm out (: yes I am AWESOME because I use backwards smileys and know wonderful friends who do as well! I go to church and try to be more like CHRIST because he is so awesome! yes yes even more awesome than me (: way more awesome. Christian at heart and hopefully in the near future, Christian in my actions as well! God bless YBIC < [YOUR BROTHER IN CHRIST]!!!
F I F T E E N
RANDOM FACTS
RANDOM FACTS
well, i am in high school, aren't i?
HAS NOT BEEN COMPLETED (: PLEASE WAIT!!!
ONE I'm CHRISTIAN!. TWO I grew up with Harry Potter. THREE Want to get married!!. FOUR Also known as Bleb, Cable, Cablehhhhhhh. FIVE or it could be say, the top whatever songs in your ipod/itunes/etc right now. SIX you could also have a wishlist with pictures attached if you like online shopping. SEVEN heh heh. maybe someone will get you something :X EIGHT it could also be a recommendation section? NINE like maybe good movies/songs/places to shop at :D TEN oh this would also work as a sort of announcement section. ELEVEN like any urgent things you want your readers to know. TWELVE or if you're the type, you could put disclaimers here. THIRTEEN or this could be an advertisements section. FOURTEEN like for your friend's blogshop or something? FIFTEEN basically, just be creative and personalize this skin to suit you.
T O D O L I S T
this should be useful
basically just stuff you need to do, like homework and projects. or you could change this to any other stuff you want yeah?
CHATTER~
yakkity yak yak
11:47 PM - Monday, November 29, 2010
SO emotionally unstable right now. just spent the 30minutes my mum was raging at me, wishing that the texta gun infront of me was real , so that i could shoot myself in my head right infront of her. THAN shed know what sortve emotions ive been hiding from her
7:28 PM
hey mummy
i havent talked to you in a while.. hope your alright =/
havent seen you on msn either :(
just yeah
hope your alright
i havent talked to you in a while.. hope your alright =/
havent seen you on msn either :(
just yeah
hope your alright
6:27 PM - Sunday, November 28, 2010
was so tired at church today =/ basically just collapsed.. 3:30-4am nights 2 days in a row drains you :S
so i got to church feeling alright, well physically i was half asleep but alright, i could stay awake. than i saw her, completely unexpected and my brain practically exploded. mental stress from assessments came flooding back in, along with the stress of her being there (even though i know it shouldn't affect me anymore) all came rushing in and crushed what little chance i had of staying awake. i just lost the will to stay awake and yeah.
Was quiet through our entire study, it pissed me off even more, how the guys in my study, cant grow up. Can't they see that Henry is trying to teach us, to help us grow as christians, yet they have to act immature and just be complete idiots just to try to annoy him, so that they have more to complain about. If they think Henry is strict on them, its because your making him have to be, maybe if you acted more mature he would loosen up and you'd learn more. i mean, when Henry asked what we wanted to be remembered for, Jeremy; "eating the most buffets in the world", Kenneth; "being a superhero, or breaking the most world records." i mean, yeah what are you? 7? than at the end of the study, Henry says that he hopes when we grow older and think about it more, we'll realise that as christians we should want to be remembered for being a christian, and the things we've done in the name of God. Kenneth than goes on to complain about how Henry is "partonising" him by saying "when you guys grow up...." but what do you want from him kenneth? he's trying to teach us, and yet you give him answers like "for being a superhero" and shit like that. yeah, i agree with him. GROW UP! and thats to my entire bible study, try to understand how Henry feels, trying to teach us, and yet being given answers like this. This includes me, i have a long way to go as well... so yeah. I just wish the guys would understand...
so i got to church feeling alright, well physically i was half asleep but alright, i could stay awake. than i saw her, completely unexpected and my brain practically exploded. mental stress from assessments came flooding back in, along with the stress of her being there (even though i know it shouldn't affect me anymore) all came rushing in and crushed what little chance i had of staying awake. i just lost the will to stay awake and yeah.
Was quiet through our entire study, it pissed me off even more, how the guys in my study, cant grow up. Can't they see that Henry is trying to teach us, to help us grow as christians, yet they have to act immature and just be complete idiots just to try to annoy him, so that they have more to complain about. If they think Henry is strict on them, its because your making him have to be, maybe if you acted more mature he would loosen up and you'd learn more. i mean, when Henry asked what we wanted to be remembered for, Jeremy; "eating the most buffets in the world", Kenneth; "being a superhero, or breaking the most world records." i mean, yeah what are you? 7? than at the end of the study, Henry says that he hopes when we grow older and think about it more, we'll realise that as christians we should want to be remembered for being a christian, and the things we've done in the name of God. Kenneth than goes on to complain about how Henry is "partonising" him by saying "when you guys grow up...." but what do you want from him kenneth? he's trying to teach us, and yet you give him answers like "for being a superhero" and shit like that. yeah, i agree with him. GROW UP! and thats to my entire bible study, try to understand how Henry feels, trying to teach us, and yet being given answers like this. This includes me, i have a long way to go as well... so yeah. I just wish the guys would understand...
11:43 PM - Sunday, November 21, 2010
i dont know what im thinking...
i think i might tell her how i feel.
though i dont know how ill feel after or anything. and ill almost definately just get hurt. i might.
after assessments and stuff. closer to the holidays. I might.
i think it could help me. but it could do the opposite.
in the end.
i might.
i think i might tell her how i feel.
though i dont know how ill feel after or anything. and ill almost definately just get hurt. i might.
after assessments and stuff. closer to the holidays. I might.
i think it could help me. but it could do the opposite.
in the end.
i might.
11:07 PM
I give..
what am i even trying to do.. Am i so up myself that i can think, that I'd be able to help people, make them feel better, happier, when i cant even control myself..
How can i help someone when i can't help myself. When I'm the one falling apart at night. I'm such a shit friend.. trying to help my friends, only to make them feel bad because i end up breaking down instead. I promised myself i wouldn't get attached enough to someone, where missing them would hurt me this much. I made that promise to myself, so that i could try and feel just that little bit better. Why am i failing now. When it was so easy before, when i could do so much more and just switch off all my feelings.
What's changed in me.
Im scared of being hurt,
i don't want to feel that pain again,
I'd rather be friends even,
nothing more
nothing less
But i cant even talk to you properly, without feeling bad, that i like you and i know i shouldn't.
i should rebuild that wall, mend the holes that broke through it. Fortify it, strengthen it, not let it break again.
that wall protected me.. and now its practically gone..
Sometimes, I miss having it there, so that i could turn off how i feel, just " stone out" and ignore everyone, everything and just do nothing..
Sometimes..
what am i even trying to do.. Am i so up myself that i can think, that I'd be able to help people, make them feel better, happier, when i cant even control myself..
How can i help someone when i can't help myself. When I'm the one falling apart at night. I'm such a shit friend.. trying to help my friends, only to make them feel bad because i end up breaking down instead. I promised myself i wouldn't get attached enough to someone, where missing them would hurt me this much. I made that promise to myself, so that i could try and feel just that little bit better. Why am i failing now. When it was so easy before, when i could do so much more and just switch off all my feelings.
What's changed in me.
Im scared of being hurt,
i don't want to feel that pain again,
I'd rather be friends even,
nothing more
nothing less
But i cant even talk to you properly, without feeling bad, that i like you and i know i shouldn't.
i should rebuild that wall, mend the holes that broke through it. Fortify it, strengthen it, not let it break again.
that wall protected me.. and now its practically gone..
Sometimes, I miss having it there, so that i could turn off how i feel, just " stone out" and ignore everyone, everything and just do nothing..
Sometimes..
10:02 PM - Saturday, November 20, 2010
yeah.. doesnt fking help when they take your phone while your sleeping. even my fking "friends" wont do that. WTF is your problem.
9:39 PM
Dear parents,
you REALLY need to understand, that when im in a crap mood and try to sleep it off. Waking me up to tell me to eat dinner, than yelling at me non-stop while im stumbling out half asleep, is NOT going to make me feel any better. Especially if you yell at me that we're eating dinner, than make me wait for freaking 15 minutes. and they wonder why i dont eat/why im so skinny.
Than when i go back in to attempt to SLEEP IT ALL OFF you yell at me to make me do the fking dishes. DO YOU REALLY NOT GET IT!?!?
on a SLIGHTLY better note, did absolutely nothing today. Didn't go english tutor, where i was going to start my english assessment, did no eco, maths study for assessments on tues and fri, etc etc. slept from 5-7 and 7:20 - 930.
yay for a productive day.....
you REALLY need to understand, that when im in a crap mood and try to sleep it off. Waking me up to tell me to eat dinner, than yelling at me non-stop while im stumbling out half asleep, is NOT going to make me feel any better. Especially if you yell at me that we're eating dinner, than make me wait for freaking 15 minutes. and they wonder why i dont eat/why im so skinny.
Than when i go back in to attempt to SLEEP IT ALL OFF you yell at me to make me do the fking dishes. DO YOU REALLY NOT GET IT!?!?
on a SLIGHTLY better note, did absolutely nothing today. Didn't go english tutor, where i was going to start my english assessment, did no eco, maths study for assessments on tues and fri, etc etc. slept from 5-7 and 7:20 - 930.
yay for a productive day.....
11:19 PM - Monday, November 15, 2010
i dont know who he is, but i have my guesses.
hope hes cool.
hope hes cool.
7:42 PM - Sunday, November 14, 2010
Hey,
well.. apparently youve read my blog. i dont know how or who told you but whatever.
hope you find stuff you love, hate, dont give a shit about, and anything else you want to know.
bye
well.. apparently youve read my blog. i dont know how or who told you but whatever.
hope you find stuff you love, hate, dont give a shit about, and anything else you want to know.
bye
11:14 PM - Saturday, November 13, 2010
mood swings are for the cool kids..
it even amazes me how fast my mood can change from happy to sad, or sad to depressed
or something like that.
how are you feeling....? please tell me :( i wish i could help somehow. but i cant.. im sorry >< if only i could. i would cheer you up.. sorry
10:47 PM - Tuesday, November 9, 2010
All the best highs,
Are followed by the biggest lows.
I saw this coming
8:41 PM - Monday, November 8, 2010
yeah.. first time ive asked about dilys in i dont know how long...
my friend who i asked who still talks to her, just tells me shes alright. but could be better..
i guess we all could be better. but we have to make do with what we've got and what god has given us.
i know ive hurt her and ruined what could have been alot of good things for her. and im sorry. im so sorry =/
well i just hope your okay and am moving on, for your sake..
sorry...
P.S dear .
i dont know who you are.. but i agree completely... i am cruel
4:21 PM - Saturday, November 6, 2010
Hi dilys.
i know you wont read this but
ive moved on :)
im happier, well i think im getting there, knowing that i can be happy even if im not with you. I hope that you have as well, though you may say stuff or do stuff, I hope youve moved on and am happy without me now. I was honestly really happy when we were together, happiest i think ive ever been, but I know that ill remember the good memories, and how blessed i was to have been able to be with you for that short time at least.
Thankyou for the memories youve given me.
We can all move on, I know we can.
12:13 AM - Friday, November 5, 2010
Goodnight,
Sweet dreams,
Sleep tight,
_ _ _ _ you forever.
i remember saying that in the past. and i meant it, every single time i said it.
I wonder if you did too
I made you a promise, one that I don't plan on breaking, ever again.
You made a promise too, and i hope you'll keep it. Not for me, but for you.
take care of yourself,
10:43 PM - Wednesday, November 3, 2010
Should i stop liking her?
for her sake.. and for mine... sortve
i dont know..
i hope she doesnt know who she is, cause that would be embarrassing....
haha... i must be retarded... i can tell myself not to like someone anymore. and turn off my feelings altogether =/
is that a good thing?